Meaty Meatless Chili

In my pantry today:

  • 1 12 oz  package Yves Meatless Ground
  • 1 c cooked black beans
  • 1/2 onion, chopped
  • 1 tsp safflower oil
  • 2 14.5 oz cans petite deiced tomatoes
  • 1 15 oz can corn, drained
  • 1 envelope Taco Bell® seasoning
  • 1 envelope Taco Bell® sauce
  • 1 tsp hot red chili powder
  • 1/2 tsp asafoetida
  • shredded cheese and sour cream to garnish

I am admittedly wary of meat substitutes — not tofu, really, but the ones that market themselves as “OMIGOD JUST LIKE MEAT.” I don’t know how they’re necessarily an ideological comrade to the whole “not eating meat” thing. Aren’t they an admittance to the need or desire for meat in one’s diet, and wouldn’t that be a terrible counterpoint for vegetarians to make for themselves? The very existence of Pretend Animal Flesh seems to strain the argument for meatless living. I could be over-thinking this, and maybe because of that I’ve given this fake ground round a temporary reprieve by seasoning it to hell and back via Taco Bell®’s special blend. In this very special case, cloaking something new and bewildering in the familiar CanCoverUp style of a Fast Food restaurant was precisely the way to go.

Start onion and safflower oil out in a cold pan heating to M. After it’s solidly at full heat, add the Fake-Ums and stir with about 1/4 of the seasoning packet and all of the “salsa” (now, I had these things leftover from when I could only find tortillas in the various taco kits at the store). Add everything else, stirring in another 1/2 packet with all the ingredients. Add the hot red chili powder. Stir, let cook on L for a while then serve with cheese and sour cream. If it entertains you, think of making the dairy topping an insult to the meatless meat. 4 spoons!

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