Tag Archives: garlic powder

Comfort Cabbage

In my pantry today:

  • 1 small head of red cabbage
  • 1/2 Hillshire Farms Hot Polska Kielbasa
  • 1 small yellow onion, coarsely diced
  • 2 tbsp butter
  • 2 c water
  • 1 tbsp garlic powder
  • 2 tsp asafoetida
  • 2 tsp black pepper
  • 1 tablespoon salt
  • 1 c dry penne pasta
  • Parmasean cheese to taste

Start out, as usual, with that large stockpot. Thinly slice your kielbasa and put each slice face-down in the pot as it heats to M. Just let them slices be for about 10 minutes while you prep your other ingredients; coarsely dice your onion and put that tablespoon of salt in your water and set it aside. Once the sausage slices begin to brown, remove them from the pot. Replace with the onion and butter and let that cook for a few minutes while you dice (also coarsely) your head of cabbage. Mix it into the pot, coating all the purple with a sheen of black pepper and garlic. Pour in saltwater, cover and reduce heat to ML. Let the cabbage cook until it is of a reasonable wilt for your palette while in the meantime preparing your pasta. Drain at al dente and set aside with the sausage. Fifteen or so minutes before serving add sausage and al dente pasta. Stir and let heat together, serve with Parmasean cheese.

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toFurst Time, Be Gentle

In my pantry today:

  • 1 package/block of extra firm tofu
  • 2/3 package whole wheat lasagna noodles
  • 2 half-jars of spaghetti sauce from the fridge
  • 1/4 yellow onion, finely diced
  • 1/2 c crumbled feta cheese
  • 1/2 c Parmasean cheese
  • 1/2 c mixed shredded cheese
  • 1 tsp jar pesto mix
  • 2 tsp garlic
  • 1 tsp black pepper
  • 2 tsp cayenne pepper

First, pray. You have never before cooked with tofu and things might get crazy.

Carefully extract your block o’fu and place between two clean/paper towels for squeezing out the extra water. My plan going into this whole shebang was to simply make fried tofu. That is what the internet primarily suggests for extra firm. Maybe this block didn’t read its own label. This alleged “Extra Firm” crumbled into little bits and I was so not in the mood to make a simple scramble. This was my first time and I wanted it to be special.

And what’s more special than an Italian girl making lasagna, too, for the first time? Yes, I am ashamed to admit that. It’s very “40 Year Old Virgin” of me to have never, not once in my life made lasagna. That’s bad and I should feel bad.

So crumble that tofu with a fork and reserve a cup (for recipe below) before seasoning. Take your two ass-jars of sauce from the fridge and combine them, adding cayenne and black pepper. Then go to town on your tofu: add in the rest of your seasonings and feta/Prmasean. Fork it all, gently, to hell. Pour a little sauce into the bottom of a 6×6″ pan. Put in a layer of uncooked noodles and top it with a hearty portion of your tofu mixture. Do another sauce/tofu/noodles series and top with more sauce, a few extra crumbles of tofu and some shredded cheese. Cover and put in a 375° oven for an hour. Let it sit for a few minutes upon taking it out, then take that first bite and have a moment to remember that will stay with you the rest of your life. Go ahead, you deserve it. In fact, if you could shake your own hand while still holding that fork, you would.

Also in my pantry:

  • 1 c crumbled extra firm tofu
  • 1 can sweetened condensed milk
  • 6 squares Ghirardelli 100% cacao baking chocolate
  • 1 c white chocolate chips

Put the tofu and sweetened condensed milk together in the food processor and allow them to make sweet, smooth love until silky. Pour into small pot, add broken chocolate pieces and stir over MH. When all is brown, pour into greased 1″ glass pan, sprinkle chips and press into the stuff then let set in fridge for a few hours. Then regret not putting it either into a pie shell or little serving cups as you take an otherwise-delightful spoon. This ended up tasting like dark-chocolate brownie batter and should have gotten put out to set in a proper pasture.

Ultimately, that lasagna was good enough to make it not goddamn matter about this dessert attempt anyway.

Thank You, Bacon Grease

In my pantry today:

  • 2 tbsp reserved bacon grease
  • 4c cooked, sliced/cubed sweet potato
  • 4c cooked lima beans
  • 1 leek
  • 1 tsp garlic powder
  • .5 tbsp salt
  • 1.5 c chicken broth
  • Basmati rice

Your dinner will owe its life to that reserved bacon grease.

So start out with a great idea. I imagined a delightful meal of various colors and textures; not another pot of mush, y’know? Start your sliced leek out in the bacon grease at M. Realize that not only are your sweet potatoes overcooked, but holy crapballs so are the shouldn’t-be-at-a-rolling-boil lima beans. This is why — one reason of I am certain many — not to self-engineer a double boiler while something is cooking under the melting chocolate. Sigh and mix the beans into the pan.

Carefully fold in the sweet potatoes. Add garlic and salt. Let it continue cooking on L for a solid 20m. In that time, embrace the mush as just as valid as the more solid form you had originally envisaged.

Take the lid off the pan. It will be a solid block of fuck-I-can’t-throw-away-this-much-food. Add chicken broth. Make it a sauce for the rice — some of the lima beans are still visible in their whole form, and it is rife with flavor. Pretend you meant to do that and enjoy its deliciousness over rice. For it is delicious. Just unintentionally ugly.

Aubergenius! Or, “How I Lost My Auberginity”

In my pantry today:

  • 4 miniature eggplant, quartered
  • 1 ripe-n-juicy orange
  • 1 bag of Trader Joe’s lemon-pepper parpardelle
  • 2tbsp balsamic vinegar
  • olive oil
  • garlic powder
  • salt

I’ve never cooked eggplant before, and to kick off the nervousness associated with any first-time event… these eggplant are adorable. Because they’re tiny. Suddenly omigod, do these pajama pants make my butt look fat? But seriously, calm down now. Quarter the little fancies and put them in a covered casserole dish. Cut your orange and squeeze so that they are sufficiently soaked. Drizzle with 2tbsp of balsamic vinegar, sprinkle with garlic and salt then refrigerate for 2-4 hours. Put the aubergines in the oven at 350° for 45 minutes. Cook your pasta to package instructions and toss with a tsp or so olive oil. Salt the pasta to taste. Then serve your hot purple nuggets (really, they should be more of a yellowish) straightaway-from-the-oven atop the parpardelle. Drizzle with the remaining orange-balsamic marinade in which the aubergine cooked and top with crumbled feta.

The eggplants were gentle. And, in fact, quite tasty. The sugars in the orange juice and balsamic vinegar caramelized just enough around the peel and into the pulp. Also, I would like to note that I do not like the cut of the jib of the eggplant peel. Sure, it’s edible… but nothing should come out of the ground tasting angrily pickled.